Wednesday, April 9, 2008

beliefs

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” (1 Corinthians: 4-7).


Sometimes when I wake up in the middle of the night, I can hear my father snoring from across the hall. Snoring is perhaps one of the highest peeves on my list of annoyances, but rather than pursue a destructive rampage I merely creep to his bedroom door and shut it. Had this been any other being outside my family realm, I may have induced some sort of physical harm. (This includes, but is not limited to, duct taping of the mouth, pillow over the face, etc.) But it is my father, who I know cannot help this gruesome habit. More importantly, it is my father, and I love him.

Love is an ideal I would defend to my death. It has cradled me when I feared, rocked me when I sobbed, and rejoiced with me when I laughed. I define love as a state of calmness, of happiness, of generosity of the heart. It does not necessarily infer the fireworks and Hollywood happy endings kind of love, but the child rolling with a kitten, grandfather handing a homeless man a dollar kind of love.

Love enlightens the masses and creates an unbreakable union between even the most diverse communities. When September 11th occurred, a melting pot of cultures stood together in pride of their nation – it was for love of a frightened country. Every Sunday, Christians across the world flock to their house of worship and praise a Lord no man can be certain exists – it is out of faith, it is out of love. When a person passes away, many attend his funeral and other desired processions – it is most certainly, out of love.

Love is able to conquer what hate evokes. The media mass-produces reality television shows that boast violent fights and screaming matches about cheating spouses and brutally honest people. Shows about finding love (such as the ever popular Flavor of Love) become boiled down to one hour of “This girl is a dumb ho and I hate her and bleep this and bleep that I love this man and no one can stop me from getting anything I want.” This sort of negative attention is merely a concoction for hatred in a post-modern world. People are attracted to the idea, but even more attracted to the idea of disaster (as long as they are not in the situation). Watching those aforementioned shows may help boost self-esteem, but they pollute the idea of love. Love should be sought after, but not in such a tasteless and destructive manner. It should not be based on body type and size, bluntness of personality, or interest in promiscuity. Sex does not define love. Love is not meant to be ridiculed in the manner it often is now, it is meant to celebrated and respected.

After the tragedy of 9/11, many suffered the passing of a loved one. Some were able to grieve, to forgive but not forget, while others continue to struggle with the idea of this defeat to this day. How can love exist in a world full of hate and loss? It depends on how you view the world. Regardless, love will always manage to survive destruction because it is the solution. (Is not selfishness the love of self? Even in situations where a problem may have been solved merely for the other to have his way, you are experiencing love – love for your sanity.)

Love is a belief most certainly worth fighting for. Whether it is love of family, love of a lover, love of a God, love of a pet, love of the earth, it does not matter. Love is love is love. And if it is eliminated from this earth, there is essentially nothing worth living for. A man will become a shell of his former self, a droid of emotionless values. His every action will be performed on robotic tendencies. Not out of desire or necessity, but from routine. There is nothing to look forward to, there is no one he hopes to see. He trudges through life without questioning. Why bother doing so? The answer cannot excite him, for he feels no love.

Many take the freedom of love in America for granted. There remain countries where arranged marriage still exists – where you cannot choose to marry someone you love. Some expressions of love must be kept hidden in fear of exposure or expulsion. Love is not meant to be stressful. It is meant to be a beautiful occurrence, meant to engulf every heart of every being on this earth. For we all hold one thing in common: we are human, and we love.

So I encourage you to love, and love often. Smile at an unfriendly peer, embrace a friend who needs reassurance, be earnest, be honest, say something simple like please and thank you. Spread happiness, and build circles of love. Do not become entrapped by a cement wall of hate.


“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love” (1 Corinthians 13:13).

7 comments:

Ms. H said...

You have taken on a huge concept and try to show so many manifestations of love. Perhaps narrow your focus and elaborate on a few elements rather than giving a cursory look to many.

Love this image: the child rolling with a kitten, grandfather handing a homeless man a dollar kind of love.

theteach said...

Have you read Eric Fromm's The Art of Loving. You may find it interesting.

You mention reality shows. Evidently there is an audience who loves to watch these shows, an audience who seems to revel in the failure and distress of others. Why do you think there are such audiences? Can you explain this kind of "love?" Is it possible that people are feeling relieved that they are not these failures?

There people who "love" gossip and enjoy sharing information even when it is not accurate. Why?

Corinthians 4-7 is a beautiful passage. It reminds us to take time to think about our personal world. It reminds me of the passage, "Love your neighbor as yourself."

It is a challenging directive. What does loving one's self mean? Can we do this without being considered selfish? In loving self, what do we do? What do we seek? Can we then behave toward others as we expect them to behave toward us?

Must we learn to love ourselves first before we can love others?

I encourage you to read Fromm's book. It is small. :)

turtlebob106 said...

I love how you started with a quote from Corinthians and ended with one as well. It bring a sort of cohesiveness to your piece. I felt like the first quote kind of set the stage for what your blog was about, and the last quote brings a final close to your thoughts. I also like how you used a personal anedote. This appeals to both ethos and pathos. You appeal to ethos because it happened to you, and you are the best witness. You also appeal to pathos because it evokes some emotion out of the reader. It creates that sense of frustration at the snoring as well as the calmness of the realization that you love him.Another aspect of your piece that appeals to pathos is your incorporation of of 9/11. For many people this is an emotional event, and they can really relate to it.
I also liked how you talked about all kinds of different loves. I think that it shows a deeper understanding of the concept as a whole. It shows that you are able to look from all sides of the spectrum and incorportate them into one flowing piece.

Hmmmmmm... said...

It has been my experience that there are actually three types of love, marked by Greek names. Here they are:

1. Eros- This love deals with a romantic attraction, fulfillment of personal wants and needs. I believe that this is a flawed, human love that is incomplete and ultimately unfulfilling.

2. Philos- This love is a love based on mutual friendship. Unlike Eros, which is entirely focussed on the self? Philos involves a give and take in which, yes, the individual is concerned for personal fulfillment, but he is also concerned for the fulfillment of the other party. This love form is also flawed, but closer to the third most perfected and most beneficial love type.

3. Agape- This is essentially unconditional love. It is a love that is totally selfless, where a person gives out love to another person even if this act does not benefit him in any way. This is the type of love used to describe God's love for humanity. It is unconditional, nothing could change it. This is the highest, most beneficial, and purest form of love, the form that humans should ideally strive to achieve in all circumstances. Essentially, agape love can never hurt, it can always help.

Perhaps these divided definitions may help you to narrow your focus on the love topic, like ms. h suggested.

madcrazycool said...

Thank you for the suggestions! Ms. H, I originally had a narrowed topic in mind, but chickened out and went for the safe position. I suppose I regret it. (Hmm.)

D., great find on the love definitions! I have studied these terms in my philosophy class. Perhaps in later revisions I will incorporate them.

TurtleBob106, thank you for your opinion. :] I am glad someone enjoyed my piece. I attempted to define all reaches of love, and it makes me smile to know you think I succeeded. Yay love!

TheTeach, I will definitely look into the book. I have been craving a good read lately.
The audiences of the "love" reality shows thrive in the fact that is definitely not them making a fool out of themselves on national television. They understand the distress of finding the coveted "one", but are relieved in knowing they are not so desperate to "lower" themselves to such uncivil standards. Those who participate on the shows may have an array of motives, one of which may be to find true love. Others may enjoy the limelight. They are searching for their own personal definition of love, no matter the consequences.
Those who partake in the spreading of gossip take pride, again, in the knowledge that it is not them on the lesser end of the situation. It is an attempt to better their own image, to come to terms with loving their own self. These people rest on the fact, "Well, at least I didn't do this and this." And thus their self-esteem has achieved a slight boost.
It is imperative to love oneself. Yet the line between acceptance and selfishness is often thin. Demand what makes you happy, but not too much of it. A person should always be satisfied with their soul - after all, it is the only one they will know. In loving oneself, we seek personal happiness and confidence. Behavior is a matter of defining that line of selfishness - we reap what we sow; how we act, we receive.
Yet love can occur at any one stage in life. Even in a pit of depression, love can manifest itself. We do not necessarily have to love ourselves in order to love others, but it certainly helps!

And I adore Corinthians. :]

theteach said...

Ah, madcrazycool, I wish I could respond to you about the reality shows. But, I never watch them. I wonder why people do.

You write, "We do not necessarily have to love ourselves in order to love others, but it certainly helps!"

Perhaps.....But if we do not love ourselves, can we withstand the challenges of the ones we love?

madcrazycool said...

That is a very good point. I think if you do not love yourself, but are in a relationship with one you love, you expect that person to build you up. Their trials and tribulations are unnecessary and pointless, but when the same happens to you it changes your world. I still think it is possible. Perhaps it is not a healthy choice.