happy turkey day!

JUST A NOTE:: I am aware this piece destroys the laws of correct capitalization. I took this piece creatively. For some reason, I write all creative pieces in lower case letters. I don't know why. A lame trademark, perhaps...?


i am thankful for the cliche: for the living and those who flourish in heaven. i am thankful for daddy and mommy, who tempt the disease known as confidence into my blood stream. and for my sister, who constantly challenges me with her lust for the unknown. the sisterly struggle to be better than the best - somehow, she never loses her definition of family.

i am thankful for tears and devoured empathy. how else would k.w. know i am eternally thankful for her existence? that horrid night she shattered her mind - slapped her world on pause for one whole month - i was trapped there with her. destruction running rampant in my sanity. those bitter nights when i couldn't help but declare, "this is it, this is all there is, this is the end." emptiness personified. i am so very thankful for god's second chances.

i am thankful for pens and the right of the written word. i am thankful for the life and times of jim morrison - and other ridiculous inspirations. the scent of freedom on my tongue, laughing in my ears, slapping every surface of the body. wake up, woman. your future is peering through the window.

yes,
i am thankful for the monster i call the future. ominious, looming closer closer closer. sometimes opporitunity is scary. i am thankful for every second my heart beats faster - every second my lungs compress
and release.

some aren't lucky enough to have that luxury. i am thankful i am.

child abuse

The issue of child abuse is highly prominent in The Glass Castle. Or rather, neglect. There is no possible way to argue the legitimacy of child abuse/neglect. How can any empathetic human being possibly think beating their child to death is an option in the sense of child rearing? Some do, scary enough.

Anyway. The biggest issue between pro-con child abuse is discipline. Where is the line? In The Glass Castle, Jeannette receives a whipping from her father for talking back to him, and disrespecting her mother. However, she makes valid points in her arguement. If they want to parent, why don't they? Obviously this retort catches Rex off guard. Where is his authority when he needs it? He asserts the intangible by abusing his daughter. There. That shows her!

Whipping out of anger, just as Rex did, to be abusive. Even the greatest Super Nanny could dispense the same wisdom: if you're angry at your crazy child, take a deep breath. Step back, count to ten. Then explain the child's error, and spank away. But reacting out of anger is dangerous. It could result in your own child's death; as well as your own imprisonment. Where is the line between discipline and abuse? There are no rules or structure at the Walls’ home, and the children are suffering because of it.

In the same spectrum, there is a distinct role reversal in the Walls household: the children are the parents, and the parents are the children. The children go to school and work for a better future. The parents cling on to hopeless dreams and drown money in luxuries they can’t afford. This is neglect—the parents are not working for the children’s needs. Even basic needs, such as food and a warm shelter. This is not adventure, as Rose Mary likes to say. This is abuse. When Rose Mary attempts to parent, her threats for punishment aren't taken seriously. There is no authority in the household because of the parents trying to befriend the kids. This sends a mixed message to Jeannette. Is Dad a friend or a a parent?

Then there is the scene where Erma sexually abuses Brian. She claims to be fixing an inseam, but somehow she misplaces the two meanings. Lori stands up to their creepy grandmother, and the three children are punished by having to isolate themselves in the basement. No food, no bathroom, no running water, no heat. This is the definition of neglect. Yet, they are able to fend for themselves. The children are forced to grow up at such a young age. Abandon childhood fantasies for this sort of sick reality. They are used to harsh language and physical scandals, such as neighborhood fights. What happened to innocence?

Lastly, there is the visit from the child welfare man. Jeannette turns him away. She is aware that change is needed in the household, but she will not readily admit her dismal condition. It is a proven fact that those who experience and suffer neglect are less likely to change habits for the better. This is because abuse is all they know - change is scary. But you would think a life of abuse and neglect is even more scary. Somehow, in the minds of those who suffer, it isn't.

women?!

Destruction because of women is greatly seen with Lt. Jimmy Cross. He blames himself for the death of his men because he engulfs himself in a photograph of Martha. She represents the ideal woman waiting for him at home: beautiful, athletic, charming. He is a man fighting a war that represents, in the long run, nothing at all. Therefore, it is only appropriate for a man to avoid the hands of death for his family, his “woman.” Love is the antidote to a war so vile and destructive. This extreme infatuation leads to lost thoughts and stray minds. Thus Lt. Jimmy Cross spends his time ogling a woman who will never care for him as he does her; as the young soldier tears apart the shit field for a lost photograph, the one that killed Kiowa; revealed their location; provoked an attack. Or in a sense, provoked his death.

“When a man died, there had to be blame. Jimmy Cross understood this. You could blame the war. You come blame the idiots who made the war. You could blame Kiowa for going into it. You could blame the rain. You could blame the river. You could blame the field, the mud, the climate. You could blame the enemy. You could blame the mortar rounds. You could blame people who were too lazy to read a newspaper, who were bored by the daily body counts, who switched channels at the mention of politics. You could blame whole nations. You could blame God. You could blame the munitions makers or Karl Marx or a trick of fate or an old man in Omaha who forgot to vote.” (O’Brien 177)

Women provide the perfect distraction: something beautiful to stare at rather than the earth embracing corpses; blood kissing the earth; the destruction that is their reality. This distraction essentially leads to blame. Although not outright, it is because of women that the death of Kiowa occurred. Had Cross been scanning the fields, observing his men; had the young soldier left his conversation to a mental imagine rather than a tangible… Kiowa’s life may not have been destroyed.

Obviously, the physical woman did not provoke any sort of death. She did not parade herself in her man’s line of vision or call him to her attention. She is not dictated as a trashy, unfortunate waste of existence. She is what she is: a woman; a homely distraction. Although scarcely found in war, she was the often the target of blame.